I knew a girl she was so thin

I knew a girl she was so thin
She didn't go out she just went in
She tried so hard at losing weight
Her figure ended up quite straight
It started seeing on the telly
A model with a nice flat belly
She said I want to be like her
With pouting lips and looks demure
And when she was resolved to try it
She started on a slimming diet
No chips or beer to quench her thirst
It wasn't any fun at first

Her size reduced to 10 then 8
The more she shrank the less she ate
From 8 to 6 she went and then
She bought new clothes and tried again
And as her figure disappeared
She grew to like this feeling weird
She felt a super slimming hero
When finally her size reached zero
Her doctor said we've got I suppose an
Anorexia nervosa
We can't have this it's looking nasty
I'll just prescribe a Cornish pasty

The Cornish pasty did the trick
And after feeling slightly sick
She started slowly to recover
She ate one more and then another
And after just a week or less
She had to buy a bigger dress
With pints of ale and chips consumed
Her normal figure soon resumed
And now she's back to 18 stone
This girl who once was skin and bone
Her eating shows no sign of slowing
The last I heard she was still growing

So girls beware this dieting craze
And get in shape in other ways
'Cause dieting can go too far
You're better off the way you are, stay healthy

Chris Flegg 2007